If she is a BPDer, this delay in the onset of her symptoms is to be expected. During the courtship period, a BPDer typically is convinced that her new partner is the nearly perfect man who has arrived to rescue her from unhappiness. In this way, her infatuation holds her two great fears (abandonment and engulfment) at bay. Yet, as soon as her infatuation starts to wane -- typically at 4 to 6 months into the R/S -- those two fears will return and you will start triggering them. At that point, her anger and other traits will start to show.
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